Top Five Update

It’s time. You knew it was coming, didn’t you? You probably knew before I did, because to be honest with you, I resisted for a while. It didn’t matter that I was regularly watching interviews and clips from late-night talk shows, or that I actually had dreams about the guy (I’m a PG-rated dreamer, shut up). I just wasn’t ready for a shake-up. Am I playing this up too much? Maybe so. Let’s backtrack.

I’ve been somewhat bored and disappointed with my Top Five lately. Robert Downey, Jr. seems to only be in it for the paycheck these days, Gerard Butler keeps on making crappy rom-coms, Russell Crowe hasn’t had a new movie out in nearly two years. A word about Russell Crowe, though: in case you missed it, I am super-super excited about Les Miserables, and, if you haven’t checked out his IMDb page recently, I recommend doing so for some recent pictures that ought to definitely shut up the people who like to call him fat. RDJ is not the only one who can rock a three-piece suit, yo. So, Mr. Crowe is not going anywhere. Despite that, I have actually entertained notions of a complete overhaul, except that as usual, I can only come up with four (newer) actors who currently keep me interested, and really, only two of those are viable. And one of those, well, he’s now official. Yep. Sorry about that Oscar nomination, Michael Fassbender, but hey! You’ve made my Top Five! That’s totally prestigious and important.

I guess I’m a little bit of a bandwagon-joiner, since I can’t claim to have seen Fishtank or Hunger, or even Inglorious Basterds (I don’t do Tarantino). But, I will say that I remember Fassbender from trailers for 300. He’s the one who, when told that “[the Persians’] arrows will block out the sun” replies “Then we will fight in the shade.” Yeah. I remember that. “Who’s that?” I thought. “He’s kinda hot.” I remembered it later when he was cast as Rochester in Jane Eyre, and when he was announced as Magneto, but I didn’t think much of it. The buzz started to get louder, but I mostly ignored it, as you do with buzz. And then, my friends, then I saw X-Men: First Class. I could not keep my eyes off the guy; not because he looked particularly great in a turtleneck (nobody looks good in a turtleneck) but because he was just that freaking good. I watched Jane Eyre as soon as it came out on DVD, and again, he was fantastic. The boy can seriously act. Good acting is requisite for The List. Yes, he also needs to be attractive, and he’s got that covered. His features can be a little cruel, I think, but if you’ve watched any interview with him, you know that he probably spends at least a third of it laughing. His laugh is charming. He laughs with abandon; throws his head back and really lets it go. His smile is also delightful if a bit toothy. Seriously, Fassbender’s got a lot of teeth. Finally, he seems very bright, and he will apparently start singing at the drop of a hat. It’s the singing that did me in, to be honest. He’s been quoted as saying he’d love to do a musical. Hollywood, GET ON THAT. The last thing that I will say is that from certain angles, he has a really impressive resemblance to Christopher Plummer circa The Sound of Music. Yep. Take a look at that picture up there for a minute. He is totally Captain Von Trapp-alicious. Once you see it, you can never go back.

So yes. Some new blood for the Top Five. Young blood, too, since everyone else is over 40. We bid a fond farewell to Nathan Fillion. I’ll always have a soft spot in my heart for Captain Mal, but, well … I don’t have a good excuse. He just wasn’t cutting it anymore. I look forward to seeing where Fassbender’s career goes. Presumably, it will just keep getting better. I do plan to go back and check out some of his earlier work, too. Congrats to him, and let this be a warning to the rest of the Top Fivers: no resting on your laurels! Tom Hiddleston is eyeing your spot. He just needs to make a few more movies …

5 responses to “Top Five Update

  1. You don’t do Tarantino? This deserves its own post. I would be interested to hear your take on his aesthetic.

  2. I thought he’s already in your top five?? I kind of have a thing for Hiddleston now, more so than Fassy, but he’s still awesome of course.

    Anyway, I’m kinda bummed out Gerry doesn’t have anything for me to see in the next 3 months. No word on when Coriolanus will be out and his movie Playing The Field which I know is a rom-com but I’m somewhat hopeful about ’cause the cast is pretty darn good, is pushed ’till Fall I think. But at least I’ve got Gregory to keep me busy 🙂

  3. Huh, I didn’t even realize I had seen Fassbender in 300. For me it was like he was just dropped off by a UFO about a year and a half ago. It felt like he came out of nowhere and was suddenly in everything, not unlike Colin Farrell in the early 2000s.

  4. “I don’t do Tarantino” !!! I just spit out my morning coffee on the keyboard
    Looking forward to seeing Fassbender in Prometheus

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